Dear Family and friends,
I am so grateful for you all! This week has been really good. This week God has taught me that He LOVES His children and that He knows us individually. There were two specific experiences this week that emphasized this to me
First, Sorella Mikesell and I had a lesson planned with 2 investigators, a mother and son. The son is in his late 40's. We had taught the Restoration lesson earlier and we planned to go and explain the Book of Mormon further. When we arrived, the son was not there. He had been unable to come. But we were there with the mom and her sister (who is a member). We thought this was perfect because we wanted to gauge how the mother was understanding the lessons. We started asking her if she had kept her commitments and what she had liked in the Restoration opuscolo. Based on her questions we did a quick review of the restoration, but the Spirit led us to focus on priesthood. Sorellla Mikesell bore her testimony about how the priesthood has blessed her life. As we were sitting there the idea came to me. "Go and sit closer to the mom. Leave your seat and go sit closer." So I did.
As I was sitting there, I talked to this woman clearly about eternal families and that through the restored priesthood we can be with our families forever. I bore testimony that her husband, who is dead, wants to be with her forever. As we were talking, it came to her saying a prayer to know if what we were saying was true. She initially refused. She said, "I can't with my health." With a little coaxing she started to pray. It was the sweetest simplest prayer ever. The Spirit poured into the room. Between her faltering words, I felt that it had been a long time since she had talked with God and HE was ECSTATIC to hear from her. As she ended her prayer we were all in tears. It was a simple moment but I will not forget it.
Second, earlier in the week I was having a hard time. A lot of insecurities had arisen. I felt like I had been forgotten, and that I had not done anything important here, on my mission. I knew these thoughts were from Satan, but I was having a hard time making them go away. Then the other day I was reading in Alma 29:11-14.
11 Yea, and I also remember the captivity of my fathers; for I surely do know that the aLord did deliver them out of bondage, and by this did establish his church; yea, the Lord God, the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob, did deliver them out of bondage.
12 Yea, I have always remembered the captivity of my fathers; and that same God who adelivered them out of the hands of the Egyptians did deliver them out of bbondage.
13 Yea, and that same God did establish his church among them; yea, and that same God hath called me by a aholy calling, to bpreach the word unto this people, and hath given me much success, in the which my joy is full.
14 But I do not joy in my own asuccess alone, but my joy is more full because of the success of my brethren, who have been up to the land of Nephi.
I realized that the same God of Abraham and Isaac has called me, like he called Alma. God has "given me much success" (Alma 29:13) and "my joy is full!" Immediately these verses became very personal. I know it was God telling me that HE had called me, and if I was obedient, HE would bless me with joy and with "success".
I was so happy. I realized that I had a long way to go, but I do find pure joy in the success and efforts of other missionaries, and I am honored to work with them. Then another depressing thought came into my mind, "but your part is not important." In that exact moment, I was going to read a recent General Conference talk (I am trying to read all of the April 2013 conference before the next General Conference.) Right after this thought came, I turned to the talk I needed to read. It was by Elaine S. Dalton. I read the heading and I felt like God was saying it to me
"As daughters of GOD, we are each unique and different ... and yet our PART MATTERS because WE MATTER!"
When I read that I knew that everything I have done on my mission has mattered. Every smile, every door, every conversation, every lesson has mattered because I, personally, matter to the Lord. It is hard for me to fully express this experience but it was very beautiful. And it was just for me! I am so grateful for my Heavenly Father who loves me enough to worry about how I am feeling, and to send me these little moments, which are big to me.
Today I read another great talk that I invite you all to read, "Forget me Not" by President Dieter F. Uchtdorf. You find it in the November 2011 Ensign\Liahona. It was amazing.
I love you all so much and I feel blessed to be God's missionary and to have this "holy calling"
Lots of love,
Sorella Preston